toriapoptosis | Entries tagged with graduate school

I am wishy-washing and all I know is that I like being in school. I am reading Francine Prose's Reading Like a Writer and have to admit it has turned me off a little from the idea of attending graduate school for Literature. I have been more drawn too (again) CSULB's Cultural and Social Analysis of Education program. Although I love literature, perhaps I should love it on my own? If only my undergraduate program could have just continued. And then I have these thoughts, and it makes me want to enroll in the Master's program! Can I love language and literature the same way I did when earning my BA? If I get have to a lot of the same professors that I had in undergrad, then I think I'd be okay. Not wanting to narrow my scope too much, I've been lounging around today while Luka has been sleeping, just looking into different Master's programs at nearby universities.

Just because I enjoy reading and discussing literature doesn't mean that teaching it is what I'm most passionate about. I like the crossroads of education, mental health, and social justice. What sort of paying job do I do there? Or rather, what meaningful work can I invest myself in that can also pay the bills?

UC Irvine (14 miles) - Their MAT program sounds great! Great your teaching credential and a Master's degree all in one. However, this is only offered full time... no way I could work and do this program simultaneously. The MA in European Thought and Culture sounds very interesting. Like a more rigorous version of the CSUN's MA in Humanities. UCI sounds intense haha. I'm too tired and depressed to take on the challenge. If I was in better mental and physical health, I'd be up for the challenge. But I'm drained, dude. Should I wait to try to get my health in order before starting up school again? I don't know if I could deal with their PhD or MA program in English. This would probably be the only school I'd be interested in going for English MA other than CSULB.

UC Los Angeles (40 miles) - Cool transitional programs that are Master's and leads into PhD program!

~~UC Riverside~~ (50 miles) - Lots of PHD programs

~~UC San Diego~~ (83 miles)

CSU Long Beach (8 miles) - You know me. English MA, or the Education route via SCAE.

~~CSU Fullerto~~n (17 miles) - Nothing standout here that I couldn't get a school closer to me (for my fields of interest at least)

~~CSU Dominguez Hills~~ (19 miles) - Lots of online certificate programs, but nothing I'm interested in for a Master's

~~Cal State Los Angeles~~ (32 miles)

~~CSU Pomona~~ (32 miles)

CSU Northridge (54 miles) -- Not going to lie, the MA in Humanities seems very appealing to me, but the more sensible side of me feels like this program is a trap. Listen to this; it's too good to be true!

"This mind-expanding, graduate-degree program is for college graduates of any age, area of expertise, or stage in their careers who want to become more innovative as problem-solvers and leaders in their communities and workplaces. Designed especially for those with wide-ranging interests (e.g., business, education, art and lifelong learning), CSUN’s online Humanities program is an excellent choice for those who want to make their lives as meaningful as possible while keeping their options for further exploration and professional development open.This 20-month, fully online program offers a course of study that emphasizes critical thinking, discussion and reflection. Through these processes, participants discover how to achieve more holistic, effective and fulfilling lives in any profession or area of interest."

So... it's perfect for people like me who just want to learn and be in school and pay CSUN $27,000 hahah. I love the idea of this program. Okay, shit. Last resort? Or first? HAHA. Fuck.

I also like the idea of their all-online Diverse Community Development Leadership, MA program. Seems similar to CSULB's CSAE program. Cost of program is $25,000. This could work well with my current job at Stanbridge and help me into my daydreamed foray into creating a Diversity Program and Training at the school.

~~CSU San Bernadino~~ (62 miles) - interested in TESOL, MA; also their MA in English and Writing Studies -- no way to drive there by 4 PM daily

~~CSU San Marcos~~ (74 miles) - interested in MA in Literature and Writing Studies, but not that interested; Child Development sounds interesting but not my current field; Educational Administration sounds interesting, but I'd need a teaching credential first

~~CSU Channel Islands~~ (85 miles) - no majors I am prepared for currently

Well, this has been a thorough 2 hours of research. SOMEONE HIRE ME.

Here is the most recent progression of possible career/school ideas I've gone through over the last week or so (and that, for the most part, I've been stuck on mostly ever since graduating this past May...):

law school
library science
law librarian
english literature
community college professor
marriage & family (re-named this fall at CSULB to "counseling psychology")
some sort of program within the college of education that also has to do with counseling?
>> "graduate certificate in community college" would definitely be worth checking out if i can get into one of these ed/counseling programs

I'm starting to finally shift into not just the mindset but also the actions of a successful and accountable adult. I've been laid off since March from my job of eleven years (with a weird two weeks where I got re-hired and did orientation for what few employees we were going to bring back, only to go back into lockdown) and I realize this is an excellent opportunity to get my personal shit figured out.

It's so necessary, too. Over the past two months, I've been suffering from health anxiety hard. The problems keep evolving. Not totally unwarranted, but I've been trying to better reign myself in because I did kind of spiral out hard. Might have lost a job opportunity because of that, but c'est la vie. Taking that job would not have worked out with any sort of program that would require observation hours, which is like...all of them.

So I am taking steps to improve my physical and mental health. Yesterday marked two whole months of daily meditation without a single day missed! and one whole month of daily gratitudes. I'm going to keep going without a doubt. Before bed each night I write down at least five things I am grateful for and then spend at least ten minutes meditating. As I alter my sleep schedule, I think I might try to meditate in the morning rather than at night so it has a more noticeable affect on that day. Evelyn starts third grade (online, thank goodness -- and the buffoons here in SoCal are suing the governor over it!) in less than a month, so I'm going to try to shift with her into an earlier bedtime.

Wow, I'm all over the place. Anyway, for school currently, I am leaning towards applying to the Counseling Psychology degree. Applications for Fall 2021 are available starting October 1st, and I've already requested an invite to one of their Zoom information seminars. We will see if I have any other change of heart between here and then. Honestly, most of my other ideas were nixed after spending time researching them further. Mostly because of COVID. I feel confident that counseling will be in high demand, considering the global and national trauma occuring... I don't only want to get into the program to profit, but I feel that it will help me personally along the way. I've always been interested in personal development and perhaps I will gain greater insight during my education. That might not be a good way of going about things - I know therapists need therapists, etc., but still. I don't want to sound like I am just in it to exploit those who are at their most fragile! No way! But, given my lackadaisical approach to my education, career, and LIFE over all, I want to be strategic when going for this—whatever my next this is.

Anyway, damn, writing feels good. I've gotten so rusty, especially when it comes to writing about myself. I've gotta do this more. I feel like there is a whole part of me that is closed up, and I'd like to explore this. Often I feel at a loss when it comes to anything creative or free-flowing. Another reason why I should take back up hooping on the daily during my time at home! But I've been toying with the idea of trying to get ahold of an iPad to try my hand at digital illustration. Not that I think I would be any good at it in the slightest, but I have a want to try to be good. I've been thinking a bit about the importance of creating things, especially art, and I don't want to have never tried it beause of self-limiting beliefs. Without writing down my options, though, I get overwhelmed and then just back off entirely. Maybe this is better for another post.

Hope you're all doing well. Xx.

Trying this again... Dreamwidth keeps eating my posts! And Autosave either isn't working, or manages to Autosave once everything has been erased? Tad bit frustrating.

Anyway, this post is to help me gather my thoughts on moving ahead in terms of career. I have been looking into grad school because I honestly just love higher education and the university environment. With my undergrad degree in English, however, it has been a little tricky figuring out how to proceed. I can fall back on teaching - starting with the single subject study. I am more interested in higher learning, but on the teaching front, that would take a bit more time and schooling, and I would proceed with my Masters in English and potentially going into the SS teaching program simultaneously.

At CSULB, a program titled Social and Cultural Analysis of Education caught my eye. It's a Masters in Education program, and I actually fulfill the prereqs because you don't need a BS in Ed. Therefore, I'm a bit more skeptical of what job offers would come following the degree completion, but I'm sure I could probably find *something* at a school. This is an option, but I am more keen on something more focused. I recently saw a job for the city of Stanton (Outreach Coordinator) that I could probably land if I had this under my belt. That job position asks for a Bachelor's in course work related to "psychology, counseling, human services, sociology, social work or a related field." I think this would count. Those areas all highly interest me, but I didn't really learn about them in school much, sadly.

The other position listed for the city of Stanton (which is just a city over from me) is Associate Planner. This sounds interesting, but requires education in "urban planning, building, engineering, public administration, or a related field." Not really as aligned with my current values, but seems like hard and interesting work, concurrent with my interests. Public admin stands out to me from that list. I actually do qualify for the MPA program at CSULB (I've just been looking at this school since it's where I went for undergrad and I love it, although I'm sure I'd probably love another campus just as much). I followed a former CSULB graduate's journey from grad school to landing a postion at the Western Justice Center, which definitely inspired me into looking at the MPA program.

edit: I contacted WJC about volunteer opportunities, and they already got back to me! Asking me for my resume and letting me know of some upcoming events. So cool! I just need to get back to them. I've done way more today for myself than I have in a while. First the phone interview, now this.

Browsing through the CSULB website, I clicked some other areas I have vague notions of interest. In education, I was interested in School Counseling, but it requires a background in behavioral science, education, or related field. Not sure if that is feasible with what I have, nor that it is something I could make up quickly. Pretty much all of the areas except for the Social and Cultural Analysis of Education require me to have my teaching credential. Upon second look, it seems that I could walk into the Early Childhood Education program with what I've already learned. This piques my interest. Perhaps I should bite the bullet and get the teaching credential? This might be a wise choice as I currently have more flexibility in my work hours (none atm lol). A lot of Master's programs can be completed in the evening, it seems.

Interestingly, if I wanted to get into Student Development in Higher Education there are no prereqs! This doesn't scream out to me, but seems plausible. If I was interested in conducting studies I could apply to Education Psychology, but I'm not highly interested in studying in this field.

I minored in Anthropology but I don't feel a strong pull to study this further. Applied Anthropology sounds pretty nifty, though. I might be able to get into this program; from the description it sounds like they may not be as heavily impacted as other programs at this school?

Looking at CSUF, there are two different Counseling options - a traditional course, and a 3-year evening program. I could probably get into either, as long as I took two (I think) psych classes either at the school outside of the program or even at a community college. I wonder if this is an option CSULB would provide also? I hadn't heard anything like this until studying the CSUF options. The 3-year evening course is accepting applications in October. But without those two classes, it's too late for me to even consider enrolling for that.

Getting into Social Work is viable when going to CSUF. They also offer a Flex program. Ah, well...need some real life experience to get into this field, it seems. Wonder if there's any getting around that? I signed up to receive more info. I believe the real life experience only applies to the flex program. Anyway, none of these ^^ would be options for like another year! So that would give me time to get some experience. I probably should get back to WJC then!

Anyway...... back to relaxing my brain, haha!